The unexpected things you need when you move in
This is the week we finally made the move to Minnesota, and so far it’s gone wonderfully. We completed the two-day drive without incident, we’ve assembled six carts’ worth of Ikea furniture (just the desk is left!)—we’ve even gone to the state fair: That’s right: all-you-can-drink milk for just $2. There have been a few […]
When is a mixture better than a middle?
We often optimize by looking for a nice middle partway along a spectrum: Exercising means challenging your body enough to respond but not so much that you hurt yourself. Astronomers look for potentially habitable planets in the”Goldilocks zones” around other stars, the bands where it’s not too hot and not too cold. It’s appropriate to […]
Dual Adverbs
Recently I discussed my new project for trying to benefit the people I talk to and make them feel more comfortable. One of the ways I’ve been trying to do this is to find two ways of saying the same thing (like “Have you taken out the trash yet?” and “Have you taken out the […]
On not exuding confidence
I’m what you could call shy. Here’s what happens when I am in a conversation with people I don’t know very well. My joints start to feel stiff and my breath gets shallow. Everything feels hard to move and I have to concentrate on breathing normally and not clutching one arm with the other. When […]
Enjoying Leiden on foot
We did a lot of walking around on the last few days we were in Leiden, for a couple reasons: We had to transport several large objects (including four suitcases and a couch) across the city, which meant lots of walking to and fro. On our last day, we sold our bikes as one of […]
Habits of Variety
I noticed recently that I’ve been trying to live my life according to two conflicting principles. On the one hand, I am always trying to give my life the structure of good habits. I journal every day, I write a blog post once a week, and I am currently working on the habit of washing […]
"I feel stupid."
“I should hang onto this piece of paper, but I don’t want to get out the filing stuff…” “I should get out the packing list and double-check, but I’m pretty sure I’ve got everything…” “If I leave now, I’ll be early, so I’ll get back on the computer and try to just check one thing […]
To create is to commit
I love yarn. I love blank journals. I love new boxes of crayons. But when it comes time to cast on for a knitting project, put pen to page, or make the first waxy mark on a clean sheet of paper, I hesitate, vacillate, and procrastinate. Why? These objects embody creative potential. That yarn could […]
What to do when internet arguments suck you in
It’s happened again: someone’s made an inflammatory comment on what’s clearly a totally reasonable Facebook post, and you feel your face start to flush. You have two choices: let them have it (“it” being a polite and measured rebuttal, of course) or walk away. The problem is that neither approach is really satisfying. The problem […]
"Already" and "yet"
It’s funny how a small shade of meaning can color a whole sentence. Compare these two questions: Have you taken out the trash yet? Have you taken out the trash already? These two questions mean exactly the same thing, in that the answer to one will be Yes or No exactly if the answer to […]